Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
