its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
