Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize