sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
