he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
