its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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