I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
So much rum. So many feels.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
