he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
