You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
