On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
