Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize