pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
my shit smells like andre
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
