if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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