It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
