I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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