Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Randomize