dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
