Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
