it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Found the puke drawer
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
