come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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