Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
