You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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