Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
