If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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