After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
