she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
