FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
she smelled like a LAN party
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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