How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
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