just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
