I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize