She said her name was "party"
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
So squirting runs in the family.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
