and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
