is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
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