When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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