hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
