The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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