Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
