I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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