is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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