Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
