fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
