She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
