: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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