yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
