Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
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