Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
