At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
