Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
high people should be assigned attendants
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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