Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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