If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
