Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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