if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
